But who am I really? If you get the opportunity to take part in one of the workshops I provide you might get asked the question “Who are you?”. It can be tough to answer, and some people really struggle with it. Have you ever asked yourself who you are? How do you define yourself? It can be a powerful tool and if we work together, I may encourage you to do it sometime.

I am a father, I’m a loving partner and a caring friend. I try not to judge people or make assumptions. None of us know exactly what is going on in another person’s life, what problems or suffering they have, what stresses, what fears, what anxieties. We don’t know the experiences that have shaped them or the lives they have lived. Yet sometimes we cast a judging eye based upon the tiny tip of the iceberg that we see. I know we’re all human. I know we all struggle. I know we all have the capacity for the greatest love and the greatest anger. I know that a person is not their behaviour. I know everyone is an incredible and complex person, even if they don’t show it on the surface. I’m a writer and a philosopher. I’m a health advocate though sometimes I do things that aren’t good for me. I endeavour to do this with knowledge and awareness of that – which reminds me of a story.

I read a book once where a man named Socrates, who was a great Master of many things, was educating his young student one day when he lit up a cigarette. His student was outraged “Master, how can you, who lectures me constantly on making sensible decisions and choices and training my mind and body, do so when you are smoking a CIGARETTE?” Socrates turned to his student and said “Once upon a time I was a smoker and was controlled by the habit, by the addiction, I was so addicted I was not even conscious of the smoking, most of the time. This is the behaviour I have warned you against. I smoke this cigarette fully conscious and aware of each moment, aware of the risks and aware of the enjoyment I gain from it, in this moment. I might not smoke again for another year, perhaps not ever. This is another lesson for you. Walking the warrior’s path does not mean you can never enjoy things that might cause you harm. The trick is to be aware all the time and to weigh everything out so that you may control your indulgences and not have them control you. And when you make a decision, be present in the moment so that you may enjoy it fully and better make future decisions based upon your conscious experience.”

I like watching people, I like body language and psychology and am fascinated by the human condition. Why do we do what we do? How much is conscious? How much unconscious? How much governed by our evolutionary traits?

Sometimes the world scares me, I see inequality, the destruction of our planet, uncontrollable waste and consumerism, petty ideals and I worry for the future. But then I remember that worrying about the future does nothing to change it. If you can affect it then affect it, if you cannot, you are better focusing your energy and attention on that which you can. The world also leaves me in awe, the complexity, the myriad of miracles happening around us each second blow my mind away. The fact that the sky has more stars than all the grains of sand on all the beaches and all the deserts in the world, that were your DNA stretched out it would cover the distance from the Earth to the Moon thousands of times, that sitting here right now writing this and as you too read we are travelling at 2.7 million mph through the universe or that I have no idea if anyone else in the world sees things through their eyes as I do through mine.

I have fears and insecurities, though I’ve learnt effective strategies to manage and control them (most of the time). I have some automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) though I’m learning to swap out negative for positive. You can do this too!!

That’s the beautiful thing about the mind. We can be in control, if we choose to, and if we know how. I love movies, especially classics, or at least what I call classics, it’s all about perspective really. Classics to me are films and programmes I used to watch with my dad when I was growing up. The same with music. I think sometimes music can speak to parts of you that it can be difficult to otherwise connect with. I love nostalgia. Throwbacks. Forgotten memories that spring upon you like a sudden thunderstorm in the tropics, soaking you with a deluge of feelings that whisk you back to a forgotten time and place. I like frosty or snow-covered mornings and my breath upon the air. I used to pretend I was a dragon. I love running in the snow, through a forest, I feel connected to my warrior and hunter/gatherer ancestors. Something sings in me I can’t quite explain, but I know it feels good. I know I feel closer to nature, a kinship with the world it’s impossible to feel in a town or city. It’s often in these moments I contemplate a simpler life.

I could go on and on. Maybe I will one day, but hopefully that gives you a deeper look at who I am.